Photo: eldar nurkovic (Shutterstock)
I suppose once kids reach a certain age they may take an interest in the Super Bowl. My kids haven’t reached that stage, nor, as a grown person, have I. But Super Bowl parties are a family affair, and if you’re having or going to one, you can bet a large contingent of tiny humans will be present, threatening to skirmish, accidentally break something, or spill the Touchdown Punch.
Sure, you could leave them to their own devices in the basement and suffer death by 6,000 Cheeto-stained Legos, mismatched board game pieces and broken puzzles at the end. You could also let them stay amongst the grownups, watching them yell at the TV, absorbing all sorts of language, and fielding many questions about why so many butt cheeks were out during the halftime show. Or, you could try one of the ideas below.
Let them do game day face painting
Kids want to get into the spirit just like their parents, and they can do it with face paint in team colors (royal blue and gold for the Rams, black, orange, and white for the Bengals). If you’ve got a patient, artistic friend who’d be willing to take the charge for an hour, have them set up a queue in another room for interested kiddos. If not, a couple of art-loving 9-year-olds armed with face painting kits and printed templates to follow can work amateur wonders with stripes, team letters, horns, numbers, footballs, or other simple designs.
Let them make crafts
Crafts that don’t require (much) adult supervision. Little ones can make “pompoms” by attaching team-colored streamers to empty toilet paper rolls and older kids can make team “billboards.” Lay out spreads of craft paper, glue, felt, scissors, and coloring supplies in an out-of-the-way room and have them work in teams to design posters. Make it a contest with prizes for “Most Original,” “Most Colorful,” or other random designations that motivate them to spend a good amount of time on it and make everyone feel like a winner. You can also buy a few packs of inexpensive white t-shirts and let them go wild decorating their own team jersey.
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Set up a game room
Keep kids occupied with games for a variety of age ranges (preferably ones that are short and less likely to cause arguments—a tall order, I know). Try Jenga, Zingo, Guess Who?, and cooperative games that require littles to work together to reach a common goal for the 8 and under set. Older kids can have fun with Mad Libs, Boggle, Foosball, and video games. (Make sure to post and verbalize time limit rules ahead of time so no one has a monopoly on the game remotes). Print football-themed word searches, crossword puzzles and Super Bowl Commercial Bingo cards for the game-lovers.
Movie marathon (or make-your-own-commercial)
Honestly, the easiest—and quietest—route is to anesthetize the youth with 6,000 CCs of kid-centric television. The trick is finding movies that appeal to various age ranges that they haven’t already seen 8 times. Another idea is to let little ones veg out in front of Encanto or Luca while the older kids script and record their own Super Bowl commercials on iPads or a parents’ old phone.
Hire a babysitter (even though you’re home)
It may sound counterintuitive to pay someone to watch children at an event where their parents are, but let me tell you, it’s a genius move. You just can’t beat a dedicated master of ceremonies (or two) whose job it is to corral the restless masses. Be sure the babysitter knows not to focus on one child; their job is to organize, referee, and intervene with all ages. You can also enlist the help of responsible tween or teen children of your guests; set it up ahead of time rather than asking when they arrive. They might just want to gorge themselves on dips and wings, too.